Making the Case for Abundance and Variety

Best friendships get all the glory, but …

Best friendships get all the glory. Throughout our lives, though, friendships exist along an ever-changing spectrum, a landscape - a range of relationships; and, actually, all of them are important. All friendships have value; not just close ones. Research has shown that we derive healthy support from a wide variety of social interactions, not just those steeped in intimacy. Even though many women crave the security and closeness of best friendship, it’s really healthy for us to also have people with whom we can just grab coffee after a workout or who we see once a month at Book Club, even if they’re not people in whom we confide.

We’re happier and healthier if we are engaged in active friendships all the way along the spectrum. Our friendships are always in flux, some at glacial pace and some at race car speed. Some friendships are surface and fleeting. Some are pillars that stand the test of time and challenge. Some don’t last long but impact us significantly. Some stay with us but are a constant source of stress. Even friendships that last a lifetime are constantly evolving; it’s their flexible nature, accommodating growth and transition, that allows them to last a lifetime. What they all have in common is the nature of change, and change isn’t always seamless.

You aren’t greedy, though. Aren’t you fortunate if you’ve got even one good friend, you might ask? Absolutely. But, … life. Life happens. Friendships, like all other life relationships, change. Even those best friends you really count on can fall victim to normal life circumstances, like a long-distance move, or to tragic ones that no one wants to contemplate. Making and keeping friends, in the face of all of life’s ups and downs and changes in seasons, isn’t always easy and doesn’t always happen automatically. All women - incredibly successful women, with all kinds of skills - have had to navigate some friendship dilemma at one point or another. It serves all of us to have back-up. Because friendship contributes to women’s health, happiness and success as much or more than our other significant relationships, it’s important that we feel supported, in situations mundane and extraordinary. It just makes good sense to attend directly to this important component of our overall wellness and strive for an abundance and variety of friendships.