Hi. I’m Aili Wachtel.
I've been licensed as a professional counselor for over 20 years, and I've worked in higher education, emergency housing, and, primarily, private practice.
I'm fascinated by all I've observed and learned about women's friendship spanning that time and those settings.
Regardless of their demographics, it's been clear that women with fulfilling friendships feel and function better than those in search of more, in terms of the number or depth of friendships.
Science supports that, too - research shows that friendship can impact women’s health, happiness, and success more than any other kind of relationship!
Focusing directly on friendship just makes sense.
Giving friendship the attention and intention it deserves helps women improve their overall health and enjoy life more!
I specialize in friendship
and I can help you with it because ...
It's important.
Research shows that friendship helps women perform better at work and contributes to our happiness, health, and longevity, sometimes even more than spousal or family relationships. As some of our most important relationships, friendships don't get enough attention and intention. A domain so essential to our health and well-being merits our focus.
I'm experienced & consistent.
Over 20 years as a licensed therapist, I have observed that women need and value friendships as much or more than other relationships. I'm also regularly reading just about everything out there on this topic. My personal experience supports my work. I have new friendships recently initiated, friendships of over 30 years, and friends at lots of points in between. I've been hurt and I've unintentionally caused hurt, and I've had to determine how to best proceed in both situations. I've made positive changes, grieved losses, and applied the lessons learned to future action.
I support women with friendships in flux,
which, really ... is all of us.
"Maybe I need a therapist for this."
Maybe you do.
If you have clinical symptoms that are interfering with one or more areas of your life, therapy is appropriate.
But, if information, ideas, encouragement, perspective, and tools are what you need to address your specific friendship situation, then these resources are perfect for you!
Get the straightforward, targeted tools you want fast.
"I have plenty of friends."
Because the health benefits are clear, everyone can benefit from increased focus on friendship.
Focusing on friendship isn't just for women who want more friends.
Women who are great at making friends and maintaining friendships still feel significant pain when they encounter inevitable confusion, hurt, or conflict with a friend.
Get tools to fix or transition a fragile friendship or to make sense of a conflict or loss, so you can move forward with intention.
"I can just talk to a different friend about what to do about this friend."
You can, and if you've tried, you know this can often make the situation worse.
Feelings can get hurt and other friendships can be harmed if you share too much with the wrong person or in the wrong way.
Get clear on what to say and how to say it, using these tools, in order to avoid unnecessary drama.
Use these tools to think about friendship and be intentional in any situation you're facing.
What we want and need from friendship changes over time and different seasons of life.
Making and keeping friendships that work throughout life's transitions isn't always easy.
My resources help women navigate all aspects of friendship because friendships are relationships, and all relationships run into occasional bumps and slumps.
Have a concern somewhere along your spectrum of friendship?
Don't wait and wonder what to do; explore my resources. Let me help.